This entry was published on Thursday, September 18th, 2014 at 9:14 pm by Karel Donk and is filed under Religion Science Takes on Life love marriage relationships sexual repression sexual suppression true love. This will give you at least a small look into this important issue. For more read my post The true meaning of Husband. And it is very unfortunate for many men that had this happened to them already. Its better to lose him now, than to lose him later after your heart gets even more entangled and your life becomes more complicated. It wouldn't take long to tally all of the major pop culture portrayals of people who've waited a long time, or until marriage, to have sex. Except, I was miserable. There are 81 responses. Its preparing for their long-term relationship. Im certain Im not alone here, if only because one other person has come forward to admit that this marriage shit is rather challenging: Angelina Jolie. Psychoanalyst Dr. Wilhelm Reich, one of Freuds best students, later made a similar remark in his book The Function of the Orgasm: The natural instincts are biological facts. There is a vast difference between a commitment sealed with a formal document and declared in the presence of witnesses, including family, friends, and authorities of church and state, and a whispered, hollow promise breathed in the back seat of a car. (R.C. is totally different than living with them. True love is a choiceand its in the hard, challenging times where youll see the magic of itnot solely in orgasm. and this is only one aspect that i can see thats flawed with your plan. Follow any responses to this post through its comments RSS feed. So we see that, for a woman,getting married to a man back then meant becoming his slave and property. The advice in the 1700s was to get married to someone you could tolerateprogress! And yes, it was totally worth it." You conveniently chose to not discuss these scriptures. Chapter 9 of this ancient text deals with the duties of husbands and wives. But being an over-thinker, I wasn't 100 percent sure. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. A woman had to address herhusband with master or lord just likea slave addresses his master or a subject his king. This may come to you as a surprise, especially if youre heavily influenced by all the brainwash in our current authoritarian societies around the world, thatpromote marriage as an ideal form ofa relationship between a man and a woman. However, we need to reframe how we view sex. The Code of Hammurabi was the beginning of the institutionalization of the patriarchal family as an aspect of state power (Lerner 253). On the other hand, the economic tie, moralistic demand, and human habit foster the permanency of the relationship. Here we can see where all these rules came from and who ultimately benefitted from them the Anunnaki gods. Children want to touch and taste everything in their environment. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc. God says in His word, the Bible: And even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled only to those who are perishing. Those are just a few of the reasons why it isnt good to live together before marrying. You are worth more than that. On the contrary, sex is like most other pleasurable things in life you can have sex in ways that are fulfilling, fun, good and generous, or you can have sex in ways that are harmful, bad and dangerous. Staying Single for many of us Good men keeps us Alive and very Healthy. And when our collective cultural consciousness says that sex is shameful and dirty, we don't have the incentive or the tools to plan for sex, to see it as a positive responsibility and to make healthy sexual choices. Read my post Humans are naturally polygamists for a more elaborate discussion on this subject. (also, i apologize for typos/no caps, this site is glitchy on my mobile). But it wasnt until the 1920s that people started marrying for love en masse, coining the term love marriage.. Also, suppressing sex has historically had excellent precedent, due, once again, to the lack of good means of birth control and decent healthcare. Waiting for marriage is a bad idea because you dont know how good someone is in bed if you dont have sex with them.. it is the social demographic they are in for the most part. Happier Marriages, More Satisfying Sex Among the Perks, Study Finds. Grab Wedding Month Deals on Marriage Courses! Social constructs are now falling apart, because people prefer to talk to each other form a distance instead of actually standing right across from the person. As weve seen above, in the very beginningmarriage was all about the enslavement of women. Right now we can already see these social constructs starting to crumble to the ground, and this includes the institution of marriage. Jett added that she thinks Hollywood's depictions of sex as "this unbelievably pleasurable act where you both experience ecstasy at once" is part of what makes the awkwardness seem abnormal. The way youre talking people should go and steal from other people since not stealing is a social construct we placed on everyone Younger people dont have the knowledge to spot the potential warning signs of incompatibility that exist. Even if this person is thekindest, sexiest,most wonderful person on the planet, its onlya matter of time beforeyoull get bored especially if youre stuck with them in an exclusive relationship and (have to) spend lots of time with them day in and day out. So even as adults we remaincurious and continue to seek new experiences all the time. "I wish I hadn't put so much pressure on myself to be a virgin. Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. I imagine a simple solution. You really can't tell if you're sexually compatible unless you have sex. You can live alone, but not be lonely. What I did read however was deeply concerning. Then the air turns sour because theres no oxygen. . (you cant be both!). I discuss the details in my post Statism: A System for your Enslavement. As long as we dont get rid of this system, we will all continue to suffer. We need to be able to stop justifying our choice with the fact that we're progressive or not religious, and just start thinking of it as just another part of life. A free woman whos doing exciting things, doesnt need a pill. So when those people quote a verse without knowing the context, it becomes somewhat garbled and vague in the meaning. When relaying what happened between my then-boyfriend and I to my mom several months later, not once did she refer to my choice as a "mistake." Of course, this still will not be an easy process and should not be taken lightly as emotions and children and families and futures must first be onsidered. Both people in the relationship should compromise, respect, be responsible, and of course to love each other for their union to be successful. This is clearly to show that simply because the man is the designated head of the household, this doesnt mean that he shouldnt listen to or submit to his wife. A wife, likea slave,also had to address her husband as master or lord. I could observe this phenomenon in spiteful spinsters and ascetic moralists. However, living together as a couple means an arrangement the couple makes to live together. Furthermore, exploitation is caused by need. It is much less common in poverty. Many studies have found that those who live together before marriage have less satisfying marriages and a considerably higher chance of eventually breaking up. The bride was a slave, and gained her freedom by marriage, and hence the penalty imposed upon her in case she divorced her husband is greater than that imposed on him in case he divorced her. Add to this the fact that society makes it difficult for people to satisfy their sexual needs outside of marriage orrelationships, and what you get as a consequence is a lot of unnecessary pain, suffering, and even extreme violence, as Reich explains: Our moralistic sexual prejudices often cause infinite harm by regarding even the mere idea of sexual experience with someone else as adultery, as indecency, and so on. This is confirmed in other verses in the bible: Genesis 20:3 But God came to Abimelech in a dream by night and said to him, You are about to die because of the woman you have taken, for she is a married [bal] woman [ishsh].. And this is especially true when it comes to our love life, as, Psychoanalyst Dr. Wilhelm Reich explained the relationship betweenthe lack of sexual gratification and the build-up of hate inhis book. Notice how the enslavement of humankind is sold to them by telling them that its for their own benefit, in this case, to cause justice to prevail in the land, to destroy the wicked and evil, to prevent the strong from oppressing the weak and to further the welfare of the people. This is still the same today in societies around the world. Not because I was raging with hormones, but because it's something I wanted to do, and my body and mind felt ready to experience it. Why Living Together Before Marriage Isnt a Good Idea, How God Uses This Ministry to Help Marriages, What Cindy Wright Has Learned About Marriage, What Steve Wright Has Learned About Marriage, COHABITATION HARMS MARRIAGE, EXPERTS SAYS. There may no longer be a traditional father,mother, and son family, but it seems with a decreased global population and increased opportunities, children will still be alright. but honestly, and maybe its just me being defensive of my life choices and beliefs, but you also sound like your lying to yourself. Divorce rate at record high Lets remember that lots of mid-life factors affect men too whether it be in response to an off midlife wife or the strain of raising a family and just the stress of the increased responsibilities in the world, though! You own yourself, your mind and your body. The divorce rate on the other hand increased every year. Were also talking about relationship experts across the board. Its a whole new thing when you have to live with them and be able to see their habits if they are messy in the house, if they will do their chores or not. that includes our love- and sexual relationships, Statism: A System for your Enslavement., a very good article on marriage by Nathalie Klaverweide, 5 Reasons Being A Single Mom Is WAY Better Than Being A Married Mom, What Open Marriage Taught One Man About Feminism, Traditional Marriage Would Truly Shock Our Ancestors, But Not For The Reason You Think, Karel Donk's Blog The prophecy of the Eagle and the Condor, Karel Donk's Blog What strong men look for in a woman, Karel Donk's Blog The Difference between Love and Lust, Karel Donk's Blog What I look for in women, Karel Donk's Blog Relationships of the Future, Karel Donk's Blog Sexual Suppression and Repression I: Definition and Origin, The Inspirationals #2: Happily Divorced - BeFreeMySheeple, Tutorial on how Muslim men should beat their wives Karel Donk, LGBT pride month: There is no pride in mental illness Karel Donk, Craving Freedom, Japans Women Opt Out of Marriage (i.e., Slavery) Karel Donk, Women cheat because they LOVE their husbands Karel Donk, The Slave Plantation of Eden Karel Donk, Japanese hire saboteurs to end their relationships Karel Donk, Sexual Suppression and Repression I: Definition and Origin, Convincing C programmers to switch to C++; A look at human thinking behavior., purpose was to easily control, manipulate and enslave, On gender pronouns, gender identity and transgender people, Like marriage, the courtship and dating rituals that we have in most societies around the world today have the same purpose of suppressing our sexuality, as, As the ancient Sumerians tell us in their writings dating back thousands of years ago, the human race was created by an advanced race of beings who came to Earth from the heavens. Pros No baby feeding at 2am, no stds, college education completed, masters degree an option. If this argument becomes popular in United States, and people do stop getting married and having lesser kids, then enemies of United States such as Russia and China (especially China) could use their population numbers as a weapon against United States. No matter if you test your relationship for years before getting married or have chosen marriage over living together, the quality of your marriage will still depend on both of you. The husband is the absolute owner of his wife (or wives). Pregnancy is dangerous even now; early abortions surgery- is safer to the woman than a full-term pregnancy. More adults are now single not because they have made a conscious choice to be so, but because most adults have become so entrenched in their own world that they have forgotten the rest. 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